By DANNY YOEONO
The crime blotter is compiled from public record and is not confirmed by Martinez Police or any other party unless otherwise stated. Some accounts may be unfounded.
Wednesday, April 13
A young man on the balcony of the apartments at Susana and Castro streets was yelling at the kids getting out of school at 1:48 p.m.
Around two hours later, a man described as “sneaky” was spotted in Alhambra Creek bathing himself. If he was so sneaky, how was he spotted?
At 4:15 p.m., a man in gray, tight jean shorts was allegedly touching himself on Reliez Valley and Gable roads, while his zipper was down.
Outside the campus of the County hospital at 6:13 p.m., a man in a wheelchair was heard shouting profanities and “help me.”
Thursday, April 14
At 12:29 a.m., a man reported his wife was threatening to set fire to his trailer.
At 12:45 a.m., it was reported that a Ferry Street resident found someone sleeping in their backyard.
A male transient refused to leave the States Coffee bathroom around 1 p.m. He was heard inside making strange noises. I am sure he’s not the first to make strange noises in a bathroom.
Alcohol shoplifting was reported from the Nob Hill supermarket on Center Avenue at 5:30 p.m.
Friday, April 15
Just past 7 a.m., several large buckets filled with soil were in the middle of the road underneath the train trestle on Alhambra Avenue. For gosh sakes, somebody quickly plant some azaleas.
At 7:24 a.m., a “strange looking item” was found taped to the top of a fire hydrant at Pine and Susana streets. My imagination says it was a scale replica of me doing exercise.
A suspicious person was said to have been “happily walking” eastbound on Center Avenue near Vine Hill Way while playing his radio at 9:35 a.m.
An even more suspicious person was said to have been “shooting up” in the Alhambra Avenue Wendy’s bathroom at 2:26 p.m.
A woman in a hospital gown and a scarf draped over her head was among traffic flowing through Alhambra Avenue near E Street at 4 p.m.
At 7 p.m., a reportedly drunken man was outside the Marina Market on Escobar Street spitting at people who walked by.
Saturday, April 16
A woman was wearing beads and singing to herself at the outdoor bocce ball courts at 7:34 a.m.
At 11:35 a.m., several youths were throwing traffic cones into the air in front of John Muir Elementary School on Vista Way.
At nine minutes past noon, a man stole some ice cream from the snack shack inside the Amtrak station. This petty theft was legen– wait for it – dairy!
Around 6 p.m., a man was separated from his child when the man found himself stuck inside the bathroom at Mt. View Park. Classic dad.
A man entering the Nob Hill supermarket knocked off the hat of a person outside the store at 10 minutes past 8 p.m. Presumed nihilism.
Sunday, April 17
Around 2:30 p.m., a man took chicken, cheese and beer from the Safeway supermarket on Alhambra Avenue and F Street. He was then seen standing just outside the store enjoying the beer.
Monday, April 18
A man described as wearing paper scrubs stole a laptop and a cell phone from an ambulance at the county hospital on Alhambra Avenue. He fled Southbound on Alhambra.
At 8 p.m., a woman in turquoise pants was throwing rocks at patrons at the bocce courts. She was also yelling at kids.
Near 10 p.m., a couple exited a red Jeep parked on Veterans Drive began fighting verbally and physically, allegedly throwing meth pipes at each other.
Happy Tax Day.
Tuesday, April 19
At 7:22 a.m., a man in a yellow beanie was seen on Susana Street waving at cars driving by.
A young blonde woman was seen pacing back and forth and jumping up and down while cursing loudly and talking to herself on Pacheco Boulevard and Warren Street, between 9:30 and 10:30 p.m.